We’ve been struggling this week to come to terms with the careless comment we recently received. Horrendously posted on my sister’s page, without a thought of how it would affect anybody. Whoever said ‘sticks and stones will break my bones…’, has either never had a broken bone or was the one doing the name calling. This comment has sent us all back to where we were 11 months ago. It brought back all the anger. Caused family members who are struggling with their own demons to have to fight harder to get through the day. It made us all jump to the defence of not only my sister, but her lost son. It retraumertised us over again.
I had managed to get to a point where the endless questioning wasn’t a part of my every day. The questions that will never be answered are all still there. I had however gotten to a point where they weren’t the first thought I woke with. They had stopped going round and round my head every minute of the day. They still caught me out of the blue, but I had managed to put them away in a corner of my mind, slowly being swallowed by the shadows. I had started to adapt to our new life.
I came up with this idea about a week ago, before we got the comment. This is us ‘giving it a rest’. This Saturday night we will be lighting up 2866 Glow Sticks, one for each Australian who lost their lives to suicide in 2016. One stick for each lost soul. One light for each family mourning. Travelling the same path we are on. One piece of a larger picture for each person who succumbed to the battle with their demons. A beach on the South Coast of Australia will glow with their memories. Their struggles combinding together to form a picture of light. We will honour all of them. Through us their memory will continue to live. Their light will shine on.
Keep the conversation going;